Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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