You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
