Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
