i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
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