Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
