Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
