i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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