you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
