she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
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My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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