using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
We are two peas in an std pod
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
