Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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