Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
