I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
