Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize