her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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