Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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