As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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