$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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