trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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