he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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