For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
