Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
