hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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