i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
