She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
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She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
We left the knife in your bed.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
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What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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