take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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