i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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