why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize