I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
