I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
50% drunk capacity currently
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
