the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize