I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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