Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
