Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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