My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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