I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just googled if crying burns calories
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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