Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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