i don't plan on having that self control this summer
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
sex in a hospital.. check
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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