I will die if light touches me.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
