I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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