Whod you bang
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
