erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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