Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.