jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I FOUND THE LEGS