your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
i now understand why vodka
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
