I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
