my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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