She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
