I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
