Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
